A Friend In Me.

The oxford dictionary defines Friendship as ‘The emotions or conduct of friends; the state of being friends, or the relationship between friends.’

 Being the nerd that I am, I had to check the scientific meaning of friendship.  I guess I have always been on this quest for true friendships.  As a child I moved around very frequently. By the time I was 12 I had already moved from two islands, three different states, then to  the great WHITE NORTH. I had lived in several homes, been to numerous schools and a bunch of churches. Being an introvert didn’t not help the friendship making department that much either. People took my quietness for being stand- off –ish ‘stooch’ or aloof. I would talk more and force myself to ‘lighten up’ so it would be easier to be in contact with others.

My friend relationships grew and changed as I grew and changed. I have a few cherished ones that seem timeless. One I believe is a personal gift because no matter how far apart or how long it’s been since…we still connect on a deep level.

I really did crave deep and meaningful friendships, and when I thought I found them, well I tried to keep them. I was the one to always make the phone call, offer my home for any get together, and even got my drivers license early so the gang could hang out.

The funny thing about friendships is that they change, just like people do. Sometimes the change is positive and other times, not so much. I have learned that a friendship, just like love is a choice. I have to choose everyday to put ‘work’ into these friendships. It has also come to my attention that the way I view a friendship, may not be the same way another person does. Their perspective can be totally different from mine.

I have also learned that sometimes, one must walk away. They are some friends that became toxic and I could no longer be around them. There have been misunderstandings, fights, makeup’s and break ups. I had to choose to live a life that was stress free…some might even say selfish…in a good way lol.

As I have gotten older, my friend circle has gotten smaller. That is something my teenage self would have feared but today, I understand that it is part of growth and change. Some friendships were distractions to goals and because I wouldn’t let go, they did. There are days when I miss being with certain individuals, but I know for a fact I can sleep well at night knowing I have done my best.  

I have also met the coolest person on this planet and beyond. He has been my ultimate friend from before the foundations of the world and though they are times when I do not give Him enough time, He has always chosen to love me. The friendship saga continues but I am loving the journey.

So, make a new friend today!

 - CZL-K